Jun 28, 2016

How I Manage Stress

I always want to be there for my children. I hope to live a long life enough to see them successful by having a good family. Stress can kill a person. Here are the ways I counter attack them.

1. I identify the sources of my stress. I study their pros and cons then I do the necessary action.

2. I spend time with my family and friends. These people make the best smiles on my face. These people believe in me and therefIore they strengthen my self-esteem. They accept and respect me for who I am therefore, I am confident and happy around them. They definitely strengthen me!

3. I listen to music that helps me meditate and feel the love of God for me. This is my "solitude" moment. I mostly listen to my favorite LDS songs. They comfort me a lot!

4. I spend my time wisely. I have a set of schedule for household chores and plannings. I study my lessons and do my school home works ahead of time.

5. I try to get a good sleep and rest. I try to retire to bed early. A relaxing sleep is invigorating.

6. I say no to things that will just add stress in me.  

7. I do things that's of my interest/that I enjoy e.g. decorating my house, online shopping/browsing etc. It helps me feel relaxed when I see my house clean and organized. It is more convenient for me most of the time to buy clothes and stuff online. Ha! One of my "myself times".

8. I find the right time to blog my thoughts and feelings. It exercise my brain and release my emotions.

9. I talk to my counselor specially to my Husband. Of all the people here on the earth, my Husband is the person that I trust the most. He is my  "confidant". 

10. I try to avoid caffeine. 

11. I try to eat more healthy. I love fruits and vegetables. 

12. I take a shower. Feeling fresh and clean relaxes my mind and body. I feel good when I smell good. :)


How Dear to God are Little Children

Yesterday, I came across this article entitled "The Responsibility of Parents", a talk that was delivered by Delbert L. Stapley at BYU. I felt so impressed in his understanding and testimony of parenthood based on the gospel standards. I would like to enumerate the ones that have strucked my heart strongly.

1. Quoting Doctrine and Covenants v. 46-47 of Section 29, it says, "Behold, I say unto you, that little children are redeemed from the foundation of the world through mine Only begotten; Wherefore, they can not sin, for power is not given unto Satan to tempt little children, until they begin to become accountable before me." 

As parents, we have the responsibility to instruct and shape the characters of our children before Satan has power to allure them. 8 years old is the age of accountability.  It is a serious task and a blessing for us to teach and train our children to live righteously. 
2. Being a good example is the best way of teaching our children righteousness. If we want to teach them faith then we should show them we have faith in Him, if we want to teach them prayer then we should pray ourselves, if we want them to live a virtuous life, have the courage to do what is right, be respectful, honest, sincere, have self-control and the list go on then we should be their role model in all these things.
3. Our "homes" should be in harmony with the church's principles and standards. 
4. Parents should teach their children obedience to the Lord at a very young age. 
5. Parents should constantly adhere to keep the Sabbath Day holy.
6. Homes should be a place of refuge, protection from dangers and evils of this world.
7.  “Division between parents is unfair and confusing and weakens the foundations of the family. Those to whom a child should look for guidance must be united in the guidance they give” -Richard L. Evans
8. We must be solicitously mindful of building good and righteous traditions to help bring our children in light and truth. 
9. “Set in order your houses; keep slothfulness and uncleanness far from you” (D&C 90:18)
“Dear Lord, make me a better parent. Teach me to understand my children, to listen patiently to what they have to say, and to answer all their questions kindly. Keep me from interrupting them, talking back to and contradicting them. Make me as courteous to them as I would have them be to me” -A Famous Psychologist

I love this song! How precious are my children!


Jun 26, 2016

Choice and Accountability

There's really two big things that separates humans from other beasts.  We act, and we can be accountable and responsible for our actions.

I hear a lot of people (sometimes I even catch myself in the act) say something to the effect of: "he made me mad" or "he made me do it" or "he made me say it.".  To illustrate how we make our own choices, I ask further: "okay, if he made you say it, did he reach down your throat, squeeze your vocal cords and push air through them?".  They usually get the point that they are really in control of what they say -aside from physical force or threats.

Influence is another common justification for our actions.  We say something like: "well, I was taught this way or that way."  However, whether or not to follow the influence of others is still a choice we can reject.

We make choices every day.  What to eat. What to study. What to watch.  What types of clothing we wear.  We own those choices.  We may have been influenced by others, for example, we might be advised to eat a donut, but ultimately the choice is ours.  We should learn to control ourselves and own our choices, to do what's right and avoid doing what we know is wrong.

Often times, what we keep on choosing becomes habitual.  We stop thinking about it and we just act.  This can be said to be an automatic action that we really didn't choose in the present: however, it is exactly the result of past choices that we ARE responsible for.

Sometimes we need to revisit the habitual actions we do and evaluate whether or not we should be doing those things, or are doing them for the right reasons.  Sometimes we do things based upon incomplete or incorrect premises.

Are we being affected by things that we should not be?  That's a choice.

One of the best choices I made was to go on a mission.  I had a lot of influence both ways in this decision.  My employer at the time encouraged me not to go.  He even gave me a pay increase that I believed at the time was trying to entice me to stay.  I decided that it was the right choice for me and my life is forever changed because of it.  The skills I learned on my mission has affected me almost every day in the workplace, in the home and in my everyday dealings with people.  Could I have acquired those skills another way?  Probably, but the way we learn to apply our choices matters.  I wouldn't trade the mission experiences I have gained for anything.

It wasn't only choosing to go on a mission that made the difference for me.  It was every little choice I made while on my mission, the choice to get up every morning and study.  It was the choice to work hard, sweat, bleed and tear in service to others.

Making good choices results in good consequences.  In contrast, making bad choices  leads to bad consequences.  Whatever choice we make, we are bound by nature to its consequence.  Bad choices can limit or eliminate future choice making ability.

 I believe that we will be blessed for making good choices, for correcting ourselves in the bad choices we make, and for trying our best to recognize both good and bad choices.


Jun 19, 2016

Happy Father's Day to the Father of my Children

Kevron is such a wonderful Father to my children. He is working hard to provide for their physical needs. I never heard him complain about this responsibility. I feel so happy, loved and valued whenever he teaches them about Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ...him nourishing our children spiritually. Kevron also takes advantage of the moment whenever he is with the kids, teaching them things about science, history and all those things that he believes will help them  be good children of  Father in Heaven. Not just helping them gain knowledge but wisdom through experience. He is helping them develop the qualities that they need in order to prepare to face the challenges of life for example being responsible by getting themselves ready for school, get food and be nice, respect for Mommy and everyone by saying good things, understand the value of work, be obedient to the house rules, love for everyone and so on. It is so fun watching him play games with the kids...basketball, board games, guessing games etc.


Emma being the Daddy's little girl is being often reminded by Kevron to be modest in clothing and words. He is teaching her to be her best self, be nice and believe that she is beautiful and that she does not need make ups...

I made some chicken barbecue, oven roasted garlic potatoes and carrots for dinner. 

During dinner, I asked our kids what they love about their Daddy. I wished I made a video of it but here's the dialogue:

MOMMY:  Vey what do you love about Daddy?

VEY (9 y.o.):  He is the best Dad and he almost knows everything. 

MOMMY: How about you Emma?

EMMA (7 y.o.): umm.. I love Daddy because he is the best and he almost knows everything. 

MOMMY: What about..where does Daddy go everyday? 

All the kids raising their hands... I picked on Vey..

VEY: He goes to work so we can have the things that we need like food.

EMMA: Yeah, so we can have any thing that we need.

MOMMY: How about you Miggie? What can you say?

MIGGIE (5.y.o.): I like it when Daddy tickles me :D

VEY: I have something to say... 


I know that our kids  have many good memories with their Daddy from Father and children camping, hiking, working on the plants, shoppings, play and most importantly teaching moments feeling the spirit.